Helen and Nikki: Rewrites of scenes from S1 E8
by BerenaForLife17
Summary: Episode 8. Here's where its starts to change. Enjoy!


**Rewrite of Helen/Nikki Scenes: Season 1 Episode 8**

It was the morning after the night before. Nikki knew that no matter how hard Helen tried to push her away the woman knew the young scot would always come back to her. Same as every morning Nikki would look out her window and watch Helen come into work. However today... it was going to be one of the worst days in Larkhall Helen would ever experience.

It started off as a normal day. Helen was making sure Monica's appeal was ticking over and that she and Nikki kept some distance between each other but it all changed when the Mother Superior of the care home where Spencer, Monica's son, had been staying arrived to tell her the bad news. Spencer had died during the night. Helen tried to comfort the grieving woman but she knew that she played a part in Spencer's death. She told the officers about Monica and the death of her son and as usual Sylvia was being a cold hearted bitch so in order to get Monica some help as well as herself she went to see the one person she knew would help her or at least thought she would.

 **(Scene 1)**

 **"They'd never been apart. Not once in thirty years."** Helen knew that look, Nikki was angry and she had every right to be.  
 **"I know. I know. I know everything that you're going to say."** Helen enters the cell and looks at the woman she needed to give her the support **"And I agree. You're going to tell me that Spencer was serving a sentence, too. Now he's dead because of it. I know that. I do know."**

 **"How can you do it?"** Helen feels the guilt run through her like a stream. Nikki was right. How could she do it? And to be truthful she had no idea. **"How can you go home at night knowing that that woman is banged up in a little brick box miles from her son's body? What the shit kind of torture do you think she's going through?"**

 **"I know what she's going through."** What Helen had told few people was when she was in university, her mother died of cancer. She was studying in London and she hadn't seen her mother and father in months. She had never truly forgiven herself. **"That's why I've come to see you."**  
 **To ask you to be a good friend to her because she needs one just now, all right?"** Nikki knew that Helen could click her fingers and she'd jump up like an obedient puppy and do whatever she asked.

 **"You amaze me."**

 **"I didn't come here for a debate."** No she went for support and found only hostility and anger.

 **"You're full of shit! Like all the others! You pretend you're not, but you are!"** Nikki was right. She was beginning to be like all the other screws and it angered her.

 **(Scene 2)**

As Nikki heads to see Monica to check how she is, she meets the one person she owes an apology to. Nikki knew she had been in the wrong when she spoke to Helen the way she had

 **"How is she?"**

 **"Still not speaking."** Helen was dejected. A part of her needed Monica to get past this. She needed Monica to come around or she would buckle under the stress of Larkhall and its demons **"Sorry about the other day, the way I spoke to you."** Helen said nothing and Nikki felt as if her apology had fallen on deaf ears **"I'm taking her some flowers."**

 **"That's nice."** Helen knew that flowers in cells were banned but on this occasion that rule was relaxed.

 **"Well, if I'm allowed to."**

 **"What do you mean?"**

 **"Flowers. Usually they're banned from cells, aren't they?"**

 **"Nikki"** Helen gives Nikki a pointed look as she walks away. At least she knew that Nikki didn't hate her at least not completely.

 **(Scene 3)**

Helen had made a point of making sure she was the officer to escort Monica to Spencer's funeral. The whole experience was harrowing and it made Helen feel hollow and overcome with sadness. Once back at Larkhall Helen knew that she needed time, time to think, time to figure out what she wanted even though deep down she knew what she wanted.

 **"Monica?"** Helen stops outside Nikki's cell and leans on the cell door

 **"Nikki, I think she needs some time on her own."** That was the last voice Nikki wanted to hear right now. Helen.

 **"What, in here? She'll be lucky."** Helen knew Nikki was right. Time alone in here was at a premium and Helen knew that far too well

 **"I think I do as well."**

 **"You've got Sean to go home to."** Nikki had resigned to the fact that Helen would never leave Sean as long as it gave the young brunette the thought of a normal life. The anguished brunette prisoner knew that maybe giving Helen time and space would help the young scot the time they both knew she needed.

 **"Yeah."** There was a forced confidence and re-assurance in the young scot's voice that Nikki failed to pick up on. Helen and Sean were through. Helen knew that. **"Good night, Nikki."**

 **"Night, Helen."** A large part of Helen wanted to just go into that cell and fall into Nikki's arms. She needed that comfort and warmth that she could no longer get from Sean. Perhaps allowing herself to give in to the feelings she had for the volatile inmate would allow Helen that strand of happiness she was longer for.


End file.
